Annoyed at you.

"…hey"

My ears pricked, the muscle on the side of my head easy to move due obsessive practice.

"..won't you at least let me in?" No I won't, I stare at the door, knowing where the owner of the voice is yet not knowing how to glare, so I stare…

Hard.

"Please let me in, I have to talk to you, I need you to listen." I get up from my chair, the spring lifting it inches, free of my weight, I only reach far enough to open the door, leaving it unlocked I lean back into the chair, it creaked again.

"Hey…" I don't acknowledge her, but all my senses are sharp to everything she does, breathing blinking, moving, nothing really escapes.

"Would you look at me?" Oh now she gets angry? Pah! Like that scares me.
I feel like rebelling against my own submissive nature, growing bold, agitated and foul mouthed.

"Why?" Even though I mean it impatience, my voice is still monotone, it sometimes annoys me not to be like who I am.

"Because…I…Just because"-" 'Just Because' Doesn't imply anything, speak simple and I'll listen."
She didn't like that, it looked like she might just hit me, but I'm beyond physical, when I 'enter' this 'stage', I sort of become immune to pain, never really knew why.

"I want to know why you're angry at me…" Angry? Is that how this is named? I always thought it as a higher level of 'annoyed'…but why does she think it's towards her?

"At you? Pah, why'd you come up with that solution?"-"You yelled, you never yell, and you said many things you shouldn't have…You shouldn't have said that;"

"Said what? Do remind me whatever it was that distressed you, oh I am ever so eager to let myself wallow in guilt just to aid to 'ANOTHER' one of your so called 'problems'." I always say them in such a way that my monotone sounds mocking, adding and subtracting different accents or dialects so there's no mistake that it was me who said it.
  
"That I'm a waste of your help, that I'm nothing more than an guilt-pushing person whose one goal is to shove the blame to others, someone who only helps you adjust to the world because of pity of a dying animal…YOU SHOULDN"T HAVE SAID THAT!!!"

WHACK!

…Ah the crystal clarity of waking up to find yourself in pain, well not really pain, it stung yes, but when your nerves are suddenly attacked by 'pain' you get quite spooked, which actually leads to the real cause of the pain; shock.

"…You…*pant* shouldn't…say such things…to…to…"-"To whom, eh? To whom shouldn't I have said that? TO you? Don't make my chuckle, oh wait you did, HAH! Why should I care about the feelings of others, while mine are in disarray, when no-one, really no-one."

I stand, the chair is toppled and pushed back with the power of my rise, my height is more intimidating than anything else, while my eyes had always been soft and turned down at the corners, making it look droopy, I feel muscle bulging slightly, it always does whenever I'm in disarray.

"EVER.GIVES.A.SHIT?!" I laugh after this, the sudden rush of the air out of my lungs, plus her hilarious frightened face make me look like a mad person.
People have always looked strange at me when I laughed, maybe because it was the deep chuckles, or the high pinched cries…or maybe because I really did look like someone mad and maniacal.

I am out of breath, so I drop my expression, set the chair back where it stood, and sit down, my hands on my knees, ankles turned to each other.

Apparently, that was too much for her, she break down in little pieces, and slid down the wall to the ground, her eyes bright and wet, something told me this was when people cry, their eyes shine, and their lips thin, and make little choke like sounds.

Is this what I wanted her to look like? No, not really, I was never angry with her, just annoyed, which people tend to mix up.
I loved her still, as you do with such special people, but I can't help but be still a little stressed about her conversation with me this evening, why wasn't I allowed to hug my brother right before dinner, and why did she get angry when my little brother and I messed around just a little during washing the dishes.

I exhale, closing my eyes, trying not to see all the things you see in your lid.
My minds a jungle of thoughts, an exotic one, never discovered by an scientis or explorer, a vast place with nice things, and very, very bad things.

Opening them I still see her on the floor, a pile of limps, broken in a sense un-logical to someone like me.
She looked sad, and scared, like…something I can't read beyond the physic, I can't read other peoples faces, and that results in bullying…

I sigh deeply, 'Humans are such complex creatures'…

"Hey,"-she looked up, pupils wide and wet, the same droopy eyes like mine.

"…I'm sorry to have shouted, tough day, you burst the lid with the conversation tonight, I had to let it out, all good now?"

She grabs my outstretched hand, and I pull her up, giving her a fierce hug only I can give to others, rubbing her back in comfort.

…"Come on, I think it's time for a nice, hot cup of Darjeeling."

And so I take her hand, and I walk downstairs…
…My mothers hand still clenched in mine…